New Beginning

The day that was supposed to be the happiest day for me and suami took a total opposite turn. We lost our baby boy..stillborn.

Don't ask why..coz I don't know why..nor do i want to question why..

Alhamdulillah I feel that my faith is still strong. I have accepted dugaan yang Allah kasi..and now more that ever..I believe in that silver lining eventhough the cloud is so dark and grey. It has all been written..qada' and qadar..and plus Allah takkan duga hambanya lebih daripada apa yang hambanya boleh terima.

To all who came to visit..thank you..to all yang hantar sms and cuba call..pun thank you. Sorry for not replying or taking the calls. Hope you guys understand that I need this time to collect myself and get better faster. But please know that I am ok..so is suami...we're both holding up thanks to the support from family and all of you friends out there.

At the moment I am at my in-laws for my 40 days confinement. I went through normal labor so berpantang mcm biasa la..(cuak nak berak!!!!!!)..tapi TOLONGLAH! Bosan ok terbaring sepanjang masa! Nyesal skang aku..dulu zaman mude remaja punyalaaaa suka tido sampai setengah hari..skang bile MESTI duduk rumah and tido sampai lebam...aku TAK LARAT!!!

Tapi aku sangat putih sekarang...heheh (fakta takda arah tujuan!)

So ok..aku nak kembali membosankan diri..satgi kene makan. Don't worry ppl..i'm ok..Cuma satu pesan aku...IF and WHEN you do see me...please don't ask me why...unless I voluntarily give out the explanation. Sometimes asking why is not a solution....it only makes it harder to heal...focus on the future....

*Suami and I have been granted the Reset button..our son is waiting for us in heaven..paving the path towards him for us...It's time to earn that trip*