New Beginning

The day that was supposed to be the happiest day for me and suami took a total opposite turn. We lost our baby boy..stillborn.

Don't ask why..coz I don't know why..nor do i want to question why..

Alhamdulillah I feel that my faith is still strong. I have accepted dugaan yang Allah kasi..and now more that ever..I believe in that silver lining eventhough the cloud is so dark and grey. It has all been written..qada' and qadar..and plus Allah takkan duga hambanya lebih daripada apa yang hambanya boleh terima.

To all who came to visit..thank you..to all yang hantar sms and cuba call..pun thank you. Sorry for not replying or taking the calls. Hope you guys understand that I need this time to collect myself and get better faster. But please know that I am ok..so is suami...we're both holding up thanks to the support from family and all of you friends out there.

At the moment I am at my in-laws for my 40 days confinement. I went through normal labor so berpantang mcm biasa la..(cuak nak berak!!!!!!)..tapi TOLONGLAH! Bosan ok terbaring sepanjang masa! Nyesal skang aku..dulu zaman mude remaja punyalaaaa suka tido sampai setengah hari..skang bile MESTI duduk rumah and tido sampai lebam...aku TAK LARAT!!!

Tapi aku sangat putih sekarang...heheh (fakta takda arah tujuan!)

So ok..aku nak kembali membosankan diri..satgi kene makan. Don't worry ppl..i'm ok..Cuma satu pesan aku...IF and WHEN you do see me...please don't ask me why...unless I voluntarily give out the explanation. Sometimes asking why is not a solution....it only makes it harder to heal...focus on the future....

*Suami and I have been granted the Reset button..our son is waiting for us in heaven..paving the path towards him for us...It's time to earn that trip*

Anytime Now!

Semalam F1..suami kene pegi Sepang for the event.

Setelah seminggu menunggu..of all days..hari yang suami takdela anak aku ni nak kasi warning..Aku turun darah sikit and caused my mother-in-law to go into PANIC mode because it was only the 2 of us at home..Kakak ipar dan suami di Sepang, FIL dan driver di Kuching..heheh!

But I have to give credit to her..she managed to keep herself calm when she took me to the hospital...

I was 1.5cm dilated yesterday with weak contractions so the midwife sent me home. She said it's gonna be soon (1-2days) but there is still time. Midwife suh pi window shopping!hahaha! Jalan banyak sikit and keep calm..easier for labor nnt..

So here I am now with suami at Platinum Movie Suites at Cineleisure, The Curve. Nak pi tengok Fast and Furious 4.
*Promo: Platinum Movies suites tickets is only RM25 from sunday til thursday. Friday, Saturday and eve of Public Holiday is RM40...sila menonton movie di sini..sangat berbaloi! Kalo movie tak best, bole tido!hahah! Internet access ni pun courtesy of Platinum Movie Suites sambil suami berurut di kerusi urut Ogawa mereka..*

Ok..movie dah nak start. Aku tak beranak lagi. Sila jangan buat spekulasi. Seperti yang dinyatakan sebelum ini..SMS akan dikirim bila baby sudah dilahirkan..babai!

Update

Kawan2 ku sekalian...

Saya belum bersalin lagi..Have had a series of false alarms..but nope..am not a mommy yet.

Jangan bimbang..anda akan diberitahu melalui sms jika saya sudah bersalin..

Sekian..

*rumah mentua ada internet, tapi desktop pi hantar repair...so I'm cut off from the cyber world buat sementara waktu..*

Tag by Sapik

USING ONLY ONE WORD! It's not as easy as you might think! Copy and change the answers to suit you and pass it on. It's really hard to only use one word answers. Be sure to tag the person you received it from!

1.Where is your cell phone? - donno
2. Your significant other? - bank
3. Your hair? - long
4. Your mother? - fatimah
5. Your father? – sharifuddin
6. Your favorite place? - kuantan
7. Your dream last night? - banyak
8. Your favorite drink? - vitagen
9. Your dream/goal? - happiness
10. What room you are in? - workroom
11. Your hobby? - sleep
12. Your fear? - alone
13. Where do you want to be in 6 years? - here
14. Where were you last night? - home
15. Something that you aren't? - thin
16. Muffins? - yuck
17. Wish list item? - holiday
18. Where you grew up? - kuantan
19. Last thing you did? - blog
20. What are you wearing? - kaftan
21. Your TV? - big
22. Your pet(s)? - none
23. Friends? - work!:P
24. Your life? - content
25. Your mood? - bored
26. Missing someone? - mama
27. Car? - none
28. Something you're not wearing? - heheh!
29. Your favorite store? - borders
30. Your favorite color? - white
33. When is the last time you laughed? - yesterday
34. Last time you cried? – dunno
35. Who will resend this? - dunno
36. One place that I go to over and over? - kuantan
37. One person who emails me regularly? - anies!:P
38. Favorite birthday present? - none
39. Favourite place i'd like to be at right now? - kuantan

I tag Elsa, Ida, Beeps, Suzie, Azie and Hazim..:P

Sambung lagi MC

Pengumuman..

Semalam pegi checkup..pastu doctor sambung MC aku lagi 2 minggu..harap maklum..:P

MC for 2 Weeks..

Was admitted to the hospital yesterday. Was bleeding and having minor contractions. But alhamdulillah everything is ok now. Am on MC for 2 weeks so if you see my gtalk online (yes you anies!) sila jangan msg..itu computer di opis..

Am ok now..Follow up by the doctor in 2 weeks time if nothing serious comes along before then (nauzubillah).. Apparently its due to stress from work. Jadi now I will be de-stressing for 2 weeks...

OK..itu aje announcement untuk hari ini. Rumah my in-laws dah ade internet, jadi saya cuba apdet jika ada apa2 yang menarik atau jika saya tak tido..:P

Gambar courtesy of suami time aku kat hospital sbb suami pelik tak penah nampak aku pakai kain batik..:P *bonda in the background*

Can't Take My Eyes Off You - Lauryn Hill

Beberapa orang telah tag aku dengan bende alah ni. I finally have the time to play the songs on my laptop so here goes..

1. Put your iTunes, Windows Media Player, etc. on shuffle.
2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
3. YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER HOW SILLY IT SOUNDS.
4. Tag 10 friends.
5. Everyone tagged has to do the same thing.
6. Have Fun!

IF SOMEONE SAYS ‘ARE YOU OKAY’ YOU SAY?
Luxurious - Gwen Stefani *ooooh..ye ke?*

HOW WOULD YOU DESCRIBE YOURSELF?
Damaged - TLC *omg!!hahaha..I WAS..not anymore*

WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL?
In a Rush - Blackstreet *definitely the song for me to describe someone i like*

HOW DO YOU FEEL TODAY?
Memang Enak - Melly Goeslow *memang enak..satgi nak pi makan! :P*

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE’S PURPOSE?
Separated - Usher *erk..apekah?*

WHAT’S YOUR MOTTO?
Segitiga - Cokelat *haaa?*

WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?
Khayalan - VE & Ruffedge *hahahhaha!!!! BEEPS!! 1,2,3 dan 4 tiada apa ku dapat bersamamu hanya penat!hahahahha!*

WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU?
These are the Days - Jamie Cullum *wow..it's actually flattering*

WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN?
A Taste of Honey - Tony Bennet *laparkah aku??*

WHAT IS 2 + 2?
Menyelamatkanmu - Sheila on 7 *aku selamatkan sape ni?*

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIEND?
Semua Tentang Kita - Peterpan *hahaha!we're so full of ourselves aren't we?*

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY?
Because of You - Keith Martin *kinda true..*

WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?
You Make Me Wanna - Blue *hehehe..notty notty me..*

WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
Thanks 4 Nothin - Mariah Carey *erk..adekah kerana dia tak suke aku??hahah!*

WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING?
Cahaya Aidilfitri - Handyblack! *hahah!!wrong occasion weyh!!*

WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL?
Boy - Mariah Carey *hmm..*

WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST??
Sway - Michael Buble *yeargh..Sway bebeh!!*

WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST FEAR?
Sattelites - Sugar Ray *haa?*

WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST SECRET?
Absolutely Zero - Jason Mraz *hahahhahaha!pandai kaver line playlist aku ni!*

WHAT DO YOU WANT RIGHT NOW?
Hey Little Rich Girl - Amy Winehouse *I don't mind the rich part..heheh!*

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS?
Pon De Replay - Rihanna *party!party!party!hahaha!*

WHAT WILL YOU POST THIS AS?
Can't Take My Eyes off You - Lauryn Hill